Kleenex

As a fidgety child, I was always looking for a few minutes of escape from church on Sundays.

However, you had to be diabolical if you were going to come up with something that would satiate my mother as a valid excuse.

Forget the "I'm thirsty." She never believed for one second that any of us would perish from dehydration in an hours' time.

This left you with two options.

"I need to go to the bathroom" was tricky. Mom could spot, with 98 percent accuracy, a false bathroom plea from a mile away.

Which left you with your only fail-safe: "I need a Kleenex."

This could guarantee a short escape if a used Kleenex didn't come into the picture.

About half the time, this whine was met with Mom rummaging through her purse and pulling out a crumpled tissue. Upon inspection, she would invariably hand it to you or, if your nose was obviously running, take a swipe at it -- unless you could recoil fast enough and climb to safety against the far wall.

Last week, while my little family was sitting on a bench during church, Lane turned to me and informed me that the baby needed a Kleenex.

I started rummaging through the diaper bag and handed him what I had sought at the bottom of the pocket.

As I handed him the crumpled, used Kleenex, I saw the same look in his eyes that I undoubtedly gave my mother on many occasion.

What can I say? It's a mom thing, right? I mean, when you need a tissue, you need a tissue. Why are you so picky when the baby's snot is starting to run into his mouth?

Occasionally, when a Kleenex or any other suitable device can not be located -- whether used or not -- I will resort to a swipe at the babies' noses with the hem of my shirt. I mean, I can't use their shirt (they'll only play with the snot) and if I don't use the underneath portion of my shirt, the snot will inevitably end up on the shoulder/sleeve of my shirt.

This way the hem hides the snot and the rolled-pant bulge.

**No, this is not a photo of the used Kleenex from the diaper bag. Merely, these are the product from an hours' time. What can I say? With allergies and teething, we've got a lot of running noses around here. (And, yes, this photo was taken right before I discarded the bunch.)